Ode to Billy Corgan
Its perfectly fitting that today, St. Patrick’s Day is the birthday of the most prolific, talented and awesomely amazing Irish person EVER-William Patrick Corgan, my alternate universe boyfriend. I love him. I TOTALLY LOVE him and always will. I realize that there are many, many people who agree with me…however there are unfortunately many people who feel the opposite.
When some people think of the concept of a band, they want to imagine a collective group of distinct personalities that come together to form a magical musical happening. Like Fleetwood Mac or New Kids on the Block.
Sometimes, a band is simply a vehicle for one super talented person to make awesome music with the help of several assistants, by which I mean Billy Corgan and the Smashing Pumpkins. Of course Corgan constantly gets crap from jealous haters and music Nazis who think that he is an egomaniacal perfectionist that can’t collaborate or share the spotlight. It’s called being a fucking genius, people. Billy Corgan doesn’t really need you and you
can’t stand it.
Billy downright admitted to his brilliance by likening himself to Michael Jordan in an interview some years ago. While a bit boastful, he was entirely correct in his reasoning. Obviously, saying someone is like “Michael Jordan”
is referring to them as the best at what they do. My husband often uses this term to identify many great things like “Jerry is like the Michael Jordan of plumbers” or “Lombardi’s is like the Michael Jordan of pizzerias.” I know. Gay, but it gets the point across.
I think there is a significant basketball comparison when it comes to music and bands in general. For instance, there are the musicians who ARE Michael Jordans- guys who are breathtakingly awesome all the time and are impressive to behold. The other team mates or band members are simply scenery. Billy Corgan is a Michael Jordan. No one ever went to a Pumpkins show to see James Iha, except maybe my friend Vince a couple of exchange students at NYU.
The next level is what I like to call the Pick and Roll- the John Stockton and Karl Malone symbiosis of music. Stockton and Malone were fully reliant on the others existence in order to be amazing. Page-Plant, Axl-Slash,
Mick-Keith, are all pick and roll musicians. They can only be super with a ying to their yang. That’s why when Stockton retired, Karl Malone was just a 7 ft black guy living in Utah with a receding hairline and no championship ring. Please see: Chinese Democracy, Slash’s Snakepit, all Keith Richards solo projects.
Finally, you have the group effort or “the 1986 Celtics.” These groups are great as a whole, but perhaps not as effective or intriguing in individual efforts. Van Halen, Pearl Jam, U2, Wu Tang Clan. Together these guys make
magic, separately you have David Lee Roth getting his EMT license and we all know what happened to ODB, (or Dirt McGirt, my personal favorite). With that said, God forbid Fall Out Boy breaks up.
In honor of Billy’s birthday, here is my favorite clip (thanks, Goliard) of old school Smashing Pumpkins live in 1994. At around the 3:05 mark, I want to be Billy’s microphone. HOTHOTHOTHOTHOT.
click me!!
This entry (Permalink) was posted
on Tuesday, March 17th, 2009 at 8:21 am and is filed under Wait, What?.
You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0
feed.
You can leave a response
, or trackback
from your own site.
13 Responses to “Ode to Billy Corgan”
March 17th, 2009 at 8:27 am
I will never forget the time I had sick ass seats to a smashing pumpkins concert and some idiot had to go ahead and OD the night of the show…killing himself and thus cancelling the show. I never did get to see them when that show got rescheduled..I’m still upset about it and that was 13 years ago.
March 17th, 2009 at 8:31 am
stupid keyboard player!!
March 17th, 2009 at 8:50 am
Some good thought-provoking analogies here. While our feelings differ about Billy “the girl” Corgan and his singing (whining), I can appreciate your level of admiration for the guy. For me, I think it just comes down to the fact that he’s much more a girl’s guy than a guy’s guy. Unlike some of my rock’n'roll heroes (ie: Iggy Pop, Mike Patton, Phil Anselmo), to me Billy Corgan is about as virile as Jay Manuel or RuPaul. I’m much more into music that is derived from a tough-love childhood followed by years of barfights and alcohol abuse. I just feel like Billy Corgan spends his weekends giving Western-grip handjobs to Jon Mayer. Maybe I’m wrong.
March 17th, 2009 at 8:54 am
I bought “If All Goes Wrong” recently and realized why I am no longer in love with this band. I also saw them live at Voodoo Fest in ‘07, and was embarrassed for Billy. I will say that the first time I saw them (late 90s) at Hoarde Fest they played “Bullet with Butterfly Wings” with a percussion solo intro that went on for 10 minutes - right before the heavens opened up and turned Blossom’s lawn into a mudslide… EPIC! They’ll always be my favorite band.
March 17th, 2009 at 8:58 am
at voodoo fest in new orleans billy sported a harry potter look and wasn’t in top voice. it kinda killed the whole “billy corgan is a god” thing for me, once and for all. i will take thom yorke any day. if you need a fucked up messiah, dena, we can share.
March 17th, 2009 at 9:12 am
I had my back to the television the other day (a huge rarity, cause I am almost always front and center) and heard the beginning rifts of “Today” and I got so excited that I was about to see the amazing ice cream truck, let’s paint each other in the middle of nowhere video from my youth…much to my surprise it was a Visa commercial. Uhh, way to sell out Billy, or do you now go by William? Its sounds probably looks more professional on your business card.
March 17th, 2009 at 9:15 am
ouch. I agree that Billy hasnt been stellar recently. I went to see him promote his “Future Embrace” album and had to go on antidepressants for a good 9 months following it.
The fact is, his old material is way better than his new material- but his voice is one of the best I’ve ever heard and that hasnt changed for me.
JC-Baxter, you cut me to the core. Billy Corgan may be a girl’s guy- but has bedded Helena Christensen-not bad for a 6′5″ bald guy.
ps..what is a “western style” hand job” Does it come with a side of salsa and sour cream?
March 17th, 2009 at 9:23 am
Siamese Dream was my go to CD in my freshman dorm room. Meaning-”Today” (track 3)reminds me of several drunk encounters at about 3 am, and “Sweet, Sweet” (track 12)reminds me of an overwhelming sensation of regret.
I was pretty pioneering in my hook up music back then- usually everyone else put on Enigma or Deep Forest.
yay!
March 17th, 2009 at 9:31 am
I think you made a typo above, clearly you meant Hayden Christensen. Western grip is with the thumb pointed down.
March 17th, 2009 at 10:52 am
Mayonnaise will always be my favorites smashing pumpkins song.
March 17th, 2009 at 8:46 pm
Billy Corgan being a “girl’s guy” doesn’t preclude him from being “the man”, which is what he is.
Dena, best Pumpkins clip (and maybe best Pumpkins song?) ever. (p.s. That’s a lot of white people.)
The “Wizard of Oz” quote in there…wow. Simply transcedent.
Your husband is the Michael Jordan of sharing a hot dog. That’s not gay. He may be the sauerkraut to my onions. Again, not gay.
March 18th, 2009 at 7:55 am
Yes, that is a lot of white people. In fact, does anyone know if people of color even listen to Smashing Pumpkins? I’d like to get the demographics for their audience. I think its 98% caucasian and 2% pacific islander.
Goliard-you had a really special hot dog moment there. He won’t share processed meat with just anyone.
December 8th, 2009 at 6:33 pm
[…] all know by now my feelings about Billy Corgan. So you can imagine my surprise when I heard this little shit nugget of information which just put […]
Leave a Reply