Sex Rehab with Dr. Drew…
Stop. You had me at “Dr. Drew”.
Obviously, Celebrity Sex Rehab on Vh1 is like a dream come true for me: Tears, fighting, people going to group therapy in their robes, dirty secrets, strictly enforced bans on masturbation…I mean, does it get any better??? *
I am under the impression that the term “sex addict” is relatively new. Back in the day we used to call people perverts and nymphos, but apparently that was just ignorant. These people have uncontrollable sexual urges and it’s a sickness that needs to be cured. Leave it to some Z-level celebrities you have never heard of unless you have been dumpster diving in the porn discount bin at your local video store to blow the lid off this hidden epidemic. Obviously VH1 is using the term “celebrity” loosely, because I really have never heard of one of the people on this show–but it doesn’t make it less awesome watching one of them try to convince their friends to smuggle in their vibrator on visiting day. Sure, it would be a lot cooler if it was someone like Winona Ryder or Lindsay Lohan (two people I can totally picture there), but I’ll take what I can get. Thankfully there is no one too old or disgusting on this show, which just proves that if you are young and generally un-ugly, people will not be revolted by your promiscuity and pervy face. Bring Gary Busey into the mix and it’s a whole other creepy story.
Don’t get me wrong. There are sad and horrible reasons why some of these people are in this predicament in the first place. I just don’t see why it’s necessary to publicly broadcast this kind of personal information for gossip hounds and TV retards (such as myself) to use it for entertainment. If you want to make a difference then go to a high school and talk about it, not basic cable at 10 pm after “Rock of Love”. If you want me to eat old Halloween candy and become mesmorized by your acne scars and count how many cigarettes you smoke while painting your emotions on a T-shirt, then please CARRY ON!!!
*The answer is YES, “Jersey Shore” is starting on MTV on Thursday! Holy Shit, this week is gonna be AWESOME!!!.
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8 Responses to “Sex Rehab with Dr. Drew…”
December 1st, 2009 at 9:16 am
You see, it is commonly known that sexual addiction is often found in people who are recovering drug/alcohol addicts as well. The two easiest places to find a partner for some NSA (no strings attached) sex in this world are Thailand and on a hard plastic chair inside the coffee stained confines of an AA meeting. These people are bored to death after years of deviant all night drinking/drugging and tearful falling outs with family members. All they have left to entertain themselves are coffee, cigs, and fooling with each other’s nether regions. You could be in mid-life, morbidly obese, double sleeve/ neck tatoo’d, and penniless, walk into an AA meeting, tell a story and catch a sympathy bang from a fatherless gal in her mid 20’s who can consistently bowl in the low to mid 200’s. Try it!!
BTW- Also looking forward to Jersey Shore, the perfect remedy for the approaching frigid winter.
December 1st, 2009 at 9:55 am
omg. caught a bit of this show this weekend…all i know is that fucked up model is back from celeb rehab and she is so fake. the whole scene with throwing plates at a canvas and crying and letting out your anger?! even i got sick to my stomach with the ridiculous over the topness of this one.
December 1st, 2009 at 11:17 am
I actually was never really aware of “sex addiction” being a real thing. I always thought it was just an excuse that David duchovny and Halle berry’s ex-husband used when they got caught banging the babysitter. You know, in a “come on honey,you know I’m sick, it was my addiction talking” kind of way. I wouldn’t necessarily call any of these people “sex addicts”- more like the effects of an insane amount of sexual abuse mixed with a lack of impulse control if you ask me. My main problem with the show is this…why does dr drew Pinsky (who I read is also an accomplished opera singer) wear a fucking stethoscope around his neck?it’s sex therapy -not the pediatrician’s office!!
December 1st, 2009 at 3:11 pm
I’ll have to tune into this one! On a seperate but related note, you know what show I don’t get? Sex with Mom and Dad, hosted by Dr. Drew. Beyond the unfortunate title… I’m going on the record here saying I never had “the talk” with either of my parents. And I prefer it that way. I don’t need to take BJ lessons with my Mom or sit next to Dad while we put condoms on bananas. Call me an uptight midwesterner, perhaps they do things a little differently in the big city.
btw, I also did some research on Dr. Drew. According to the never-wrong Wikipedia, he was a contestant on an episode of Wheel of Fortune in 1984, where he received forty gallons of Sunny Delight and a year’s supply of Turtle Wax as consolation prizes. My question, how did he NOT win?
December 1st, 2009 at 4:29 pm
Anyone who makes a living counseling chronic masturbators and sex fiends and then moonlights as a sex advice guru MUST be a closet freak. I bet you $1000 that Dr.Drew has a closet full of latex, a saddle and a collection of anal beads from around the world.
December 2nd, 2009 at 10:29 am
…and sunny d and turtlewax, apparently. wonder what he does with that?
December 8th, 2009 at 4:32 am
dr. drew is just laughing all the way to the bank…he is fully aware how retarded everyone on his shows are. has to be. or, he’s just one of the million feel good californians who pretend to love and care about everyone. i say, bring back the blond bitch from celebrity rehab with the glasses who works with dr. drew so she can fight with the sex addicts!
March 23rd, 2010 at 5:41 am
Great minds think alike, but your comments take our issue to a deeper level. Can you please explain more of what you mean by…
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